The occasional, often ill-considered thoughts of a Roman Catholic permanent deacon who is ever grateful to God for his existence. Despite the strangeness we encounter in this life, all the suffering we witness and endure, being is good, so good I am sometimes unable to contain my joy. Deo gratias!


Although I am an ordained deacon of the Catholic Church, the opinions expressed in this blog are my personal opinions. In offering these personal opinions I am not acting as a representative of the Church or any Church organization.

Showing posts with label neighbors. Show all posts
Showing posts with label neighbors. Show all posts

Monday, March 11, 2024

Life in The Villages

Here in The Villages Diane and I live in a neighborhood brought into being 20 years ago. We and many of our neighbors have lived here from the start. Some of our original neighbors have died, or moved away, or entered some form of assisted living. Other slightly younger folks have bought their homes and changed the neighborhood demographics somewhat. But time marches on, so the change is hardly noticeable. Just do the math and you'll realize we're an aged bunch. 

Because we’ve lived in this neighborhood for so many years, most of us tend to watch out for each other. After all, as Dear Diane and I often remind ourselves, “We’re just a bunch of geezers and geezettes, who sometimes need a little help.” Too often the help we provide, or try to provide, progresses in strange and circuitous ways. In many respects I’m probably the least helpful neighbor. My excuse? I’m just not at home very much. Ministries in our parish keep me on the move and too often away from home. Perhaps I should learn to focus more on that which is near to me. I’m trying to work on that, as I come to the understanding that others can do all that I do, and likely do it better. But enough self-analysis. Let me offer an example of neighbors helping neighbors by relating a series of events that took place a not long ago. 

One Saturday evening I had returned home from the 4 pm vigil Mass when I received a detailed text from a neighbor. She informed me an ambulance had arrived at another neighbor’s home, and soon after the EMTs placed someone in the ambulance and left, presumably headed for the hospital. She couldn’t identify whether the “patient” was a man or a woman. I had some questions, so she suggested I call the couple’s immediate neighbor who had been directly involved. So I called the other neighbor, who provided more detail. Apparently, unknown to me, the wife, suffering from pneumonia, had been admitted to the hospital the day before. On Saturday afternoon she’d tried to call her husband to ask if he would bring a few needed items to the hospital, but he hadn’t answered the phone. Understandably concerned, she called her immediate neighbor. That couple went next door and found the husband disoriented and unable to walk even a few steps. They called for an ambulance which ultimately took him to the hospital. 

Two problems arose. First, when she called the hospital, the immediate neighbor could get no information on the man’s condition — standard hospital protocol. They were told only that he was in the ER. Second, the hospitalized couple have a dog. The immediate neighbors fed the dog, took him out for a few minutes, then returned him to his own home. Later, at about 9 p.m., they discover the husband had definitely been admitted. So they called me and asked the big question: What to do with the dog? They were in the process of training their own new puppy, so really couldn’t introduce another dog into their home. No problem. Because Diane and I love dogs, we volunteered to take temporary custody of Scout, a little Shih Tzu. Scout knew and trusted us, had been a pal of our dear, late Maddie, and had been in our house several times. So I went to Scout’s home, let myself in, gathered some dogfood and a few other items, then took the little critter back to our home.

As it turned out, Scout’s owners each spent about a week in the hospital, then several more weeks at a local rehab facility. Throughout it all Scout adjusted well, slept on our bed, and accompanied me on my daily walks. He and I established a routine that worked well for both of us. It seems, however, he got rather attached to me. According to Diane, whenever I left the house, Scout would sit by the door until I returned. She, of course, was the one who fed him, so perhaps his loyalty was more than a little displaced. I just think he’s one of those “guy dogs.” I tell you all this so you won’t think Diane and I were inconvenienced. We weren’t, not the slightest. It was a joy. We had recently lost our little Maddie, and Scout’s “parents” were friends, so we were the logical candidates to care for Scout. All went well. Many other neighbors contributed in a variety of helpful and far more meaningful ways. Scout is now back home with his “mom and dad,” who are recovering well.

Since these events, just a month or so ago, several similar situations have arisen in the neighborhood. In each instance different neighbors have stepped in and cared for those in need. Some even took ill neighbors into their homes and provided temporary care. Christians and Jews, these good people live their faith and instinctively help others whenever needed. 

And yet, the neighborhood isn’t perfect, because all of us who live here are imperfect as well. Sadly, you and I are too often ready to focus of others’ imperfections or criticize them over petty issues. Perhaps we should look in the mirror and remove the beam from our own eye. Yes, we know our neighbors, or think we do. We hear the stories (the neighborhood gossip) and too often spread it around a bit. But at some point we must accept that no one, at that includes you and me, is perfect. We’re all sinners. But most of these imperfections we carry around with us are not horrible things; they’re just human things. And as we see in the Gospel, Jesus is remarkably tolerant toward them. He forgives, he loves, just as we must forgive and love.

God likes to keep things simple, while we’re the ones who complicate everything. God told us to do two things, and if we do them, all else just falls in line: Love the Lord, your God with your whole heart, soul, mind, and strength; and love your neighbor as yourself. If we all did that, just imagine the kind of world we’d have. And even though we live in a sinful world, we are blessed with an occasional glimpse of God’s love right here in our neighborhoods as we witness neighbor helping neighbor. 

Love your neighbor, sisters and brothers — love your neighbor as you love yourself. Perhaps that’s the problem today. Too many people don’t love themselves, so they can hardly love another. And if you don’t love yourself, just remember, God knows everything about you, and yet He loves you more deeply than you could ever imagine. Once you understand and accept this, and learn to love yourself, loving others becomes much easier. 


Thursday, February 27, 2020

Homily: 7th Sunday in Ordinary Time-Year A

I have embedded a video of this homily below -- preached on Sunday, 23 February 2020. The complete text (more or less) follows the video.



Readings: Lev 9:1-2, 17-18; Ps 103; 1 Cor 3:16-23; Mt 5:38-48

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Interesting isn’t it? In our first reading from Leviticus, Mosaic Law teaches us: “You shall love your neighbor as yourself” [Lv 19:18]. And then in our Gospel passage from Matthew, Jesus, in the midst of His Sermon on the Mount, tells us “love your enemies” [Mt 5:44]. 

Love your neighbor and love your enemy…who’s left? Actually, the great G. K. Chesterton once wrote:
"We are commanded to love our neighbors and our enemies; they are generally the same people."
There’s a lot of truth in that; and loving those we’re with every day can be a bit of a challenge.

As a Christian it’s easy for me to say, “Yes, I love that Jihadist terrorist who’s been led by others or by a hateful ideology to do such horrible things over there in Afghanistan, or Syria, or Iraq...” And it’s pretty easy to express Christian love for the murderer on death row. After all, I really don’t really know any of these people, do I? That makes them a lot easier to love.

But when you know someone well, someone who isn’t all that nice, love doesn’t come quite so easy, does it? It’s a lot easier to despise someone up close and personal, someone who has treated you abominably, one of those neighbors we turn into enemies.

When I was just a boy in suburban New York, we neighborhood kids would often play stickball and other games in our street. 

Now there was one neighbor…I suppose I can use her name now since she long ago went to her eternal reward. It was Mrs. Counts, whose front yard happened to be our right field. It was surrounded by a hedge, and the only break in the hedge was the gate that led to her front walk.

Now Mrs. Counts was very, very old, probably about sixty. And whenever a ball would go over that hedge, we’d open the gate and run into her yard to retrieve it. The gate squeaked, and that would bring her to the front door, from which she would scream at us for daring to hit a ball onto her lawn. We, of course, retaliated as only children can, by taunting her, calling her names. 

It was not a good relationship.

To the children of the neighborhood, Mrs. Counts was more than a neighbor; she was the enemy. We neither liked nor loved her. She was a grumpy old woman, and we were equally grumpy little brats. 

Trivial events you may argue, and yet through them, we all demonstrated a singular lack of charity. Of course, at that age, it’s unlikely we children had made a connection between our judgment of Mrs. Counts and the Sermon on the Mount.

Indeed, it would be decades, in a different neighborhood, this one on Cape Cod, before I made that connection.

One summer afternoon a soccer ball flew over the fence into our yard and rolled onto a patch of Lilies of the Valley. In an instant our neighbor’s two grandsons jumped the fence and ran through the flowers, trampling as they went, to retrieve the ball.  I stood there in the yard, watching them, and was about to let them have it with both barrels of indignation, when suddenly I thought, Heavens! I’ve become Mrs. Counts!

And so, I simply waved to them; and oblivious to their path of minor destruction, they said, “Hi!” jumped the fence, and were gone.

Yes, every so often, I do what is right in God’s eyes. Every so often I am slapped on one cheek and actually turn the other. You see, brothers and sisters, we are all called by Jesus, by the Gospel, and every so often we experience the tension arising from our imperfect lives.

The world, of course, tells us to ignore that tension, to fight violence with violence, to respond to evil with evil. But deep down we know it’s all just a mask to cover our selfishness, to hide our self-righteousness.

We're tempted to stand out in our battles with evil, to win, to shine; whereas Jesus instructs us to offer no resistance to one who is evil. Forget about man's justice, He tells us. Don't worry about just compensation. We are instead called to overwhelm the wrongdoer with incredible generosity. 

Is that even possible? 

Well, yes, it is. For that’s exactly what Jesus did -- this incredible act of redemption in which he spread His arms wide on the Cross. He offered no resistance and seemed to allow evil to triumph. This remarkable act, this self-sacrificial act of redemption gives us a glimpse into God's holiness, the holiness He wants us to imitate and attain.
"Take up your cross," Jesus tells us, "Do as I do." 
"Love your enemies…pray for those who persecute you.”
"I do not seek revenge, and neither should you."
"Forgive...seventy times seven times."
We hear all this and are almost overwhelmed, but then Jesus adds another:
"So be perfect, just as your heavenly Father is perfect” [Mt 5:48]
And to that, we reply, in all honesty, "How can we be perfect, Lord? Perfection is what You are, imperfection is what we are."

Strictly speaking it’s impossible, for even the most faithful of us, to achieve the perfection of God. We know this and we sense the distance, the infinite distance, between God and us. 

Still the command is there: Be perfect!

But it’s not the perfection of God’s infinite power, love, and wisdom, the unapproachable divine perfection, to which God calls us. 

No, He calls us to the perfection of the Beatitudes: to be poor in spirit; to hunger and thirst for righteousness, for justice; to seek meekness and purity of heart; to be merciful, a peacemaker… These are all attainable, for the Father gives us His Son, who shows the way. He became one of us to remind us what is possible in our own lives. Piling gift upon gift, Father and Son also give us the Holy Spirit, the giver of grace.

Addressing this very thing, St. Cyprian of Carthage, an early Church Father and martyr, wrote:
“We do not have to toil and sweat to achieve our own perfection…to obtain the gift of the Holy Spirit. It is freely given by God, always available for us to use.”
Come to me, Jesus pleads, and you will receive an abundance of grace. I will help you on this remarkable journey of conversion.

On Wednesday, as we begin our Lenten journey, Jesus will tell us how to begin:

“Repent,” he commands, “and believe in the Gospel” [Mk 1:15], for with God repentance always brings forgiveness and is just a moment away through Reconciliation.

Recall the words of today’s Psalm:
“He does not deal with us according to our sins, nor requite us according to our iniquities…as far as the east is from the west, so far does he remove our transgressions from us” [Ps 103:10,12]
Yes, God forgives, but we must forgive in turn.

In a few moments, as we prepare to receive the Real Presence of our Lord in Holy Communion, we will join together with Fr. Cromwell and pray the Our Father. And as we pray those words given to us by the Son, we make a kind of bargain with the Father, don’t we?
“Forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us” [Mt 6:12].
Let’s use this moment today to tell the Father that we have indeed forgiven all those neighbors, all those enemies, and all those neighborly enemies who have offended us.

I forgave grumpy Mrs. Counts years ago. I pray only that she forgave me.